Thursday, February 13, 2014

Meant to Be

My exx, me, car builder Chip Foose, and my daughter Olivia in 2007
A short time after we married, I realized that I wasn't madly in love with my exx, but I thought we were good for one another. I wanted to make him happy and I wanted for us all to be a happy family. But it wasn't to be.

I spent 15 years with this man, trying to meet his needs, be someone I wasn't, please him, all in an effort to make him happy. I thought if he could be happy, then I was doing something right and I could find some sort of peace and be of value to someone. But it wasn't to be.

When I left I was so depressed about failing. My mother's first words were, "I told you so. . ." even though I begged her not to say it. Most of my friends couldn't understand why I left because I never said one bad word about my then husband. I needed support and understanding, but it wasn't to be.

Now he's found another. He seems incredibly happy and she seems to be the woman whom he was meant for.

I'm glad for him. I truly am. Because this was meant to be.

I'm glad I left. It opened the door for him to find someone who fits his life, fits his heart, fits in with his family, makes him smile and fills that hole that I never could. Trying to be someone I'm not never worked because it wasn't meant to be! Finding the right person is the best thing that can happen in life and for the man I spent all of those years with, the man I wanted to make happy, I'm glad that my final act of leaving has done just that.

He's happy now.

And I'm truly happy for him.

God, that feels so good to be able to say and mean with all of my heart.


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About Sash

People call me "Sash" because I'm a former beauty queen in my old home town. My father used to ride in an MC which got me interested in the culture. After my last divorce I said "goodbye" to Susie Homemaker and became the naughty, biker chick I always felt inside. (Read more...)